Don’t look at me like that Matt Preston, i know you agree. Chips are delicious and i won’t hear a bad word about them. BUT if your BUTT is suffering from over-indugence of the afore-mentioned deliciousness then consider this – Not all chips are bad for you. I KNOW. Sign me up, right?!
The following are some excellent examples of chips that tick all the boxes of goodness:
Healthy (at least much closer to healthy than regular been-there-ate-that potato chips) – CHECK!
Yummy – CHECK! CHECK!
Easy – CHECK! CHECK! CHECK!
As a bonus these chips are popular with the young and the old (probably. i mean, i assume the elderly would love the shit outta these fancy new ‘chips’, but i don’t have many octogenarian associates on which to test this theory. sorry)
So, without further ado, i give you:
YOUR WEEK IN SNACKING
What you need:
Olive Oil/Vegetable Oil (Save the Orangutans, no Palm Oil please)
Salt & Pepper
What you do:
Wash your kale.
Give it a nice swooshy bath – these kinds of leaves have lots of creases and crevices and often have a lot of grub hidden amongst the folds. I once found a whole living moth on a leaf destined for my homemade pizza, ’nuff said.
Dry your kale.
Soggy kale will not a crispy chip make! Bung batches into a salad spinner if you’ve got one, or you can lovingly dry them off between two (clean) tea towels. Just make sure they are as close to bone dry as you can. Sorry for the extra work. I promise you, this will make a difference.
Separate your kale.
This is easy. Take a sharpish knife and run it along the length of the stem (away from your body, FOR GOD’S SAKE PEOPLE!). The leaves with fall off and then you can just cut them into bite-sized bits, this will depend on the size of your mouth….
Put your kale onto a baking tray.
This tray/s should be lined with baking paper. It will stop the leaves sticking, and, if you’re anything like me, you’ll also enjoy removing the baking paper afterwards and not really washing the tray at all. Hooray!
Important note: make sure each bite-sized future chip is not touching its neighbour. If you throw them all in together on top of one another they will rebel and sag like sullen teenagers. What you want is CRUNCH. And you can only get that if you give them space. There’s a lesson in there for all of us i think….
Oil your kale.
The key with these bad boys is to massage the oil into each future chip. If this sounds labour-intensive, stay with me, it really isn’t. I don’t mean go in for a full remedial, deep-tissue job, just a quick half-arsed going over with the oil (similar to what you would offer your partner at the end of a long day….i can’t be the only lazy one)
Season your kale.
Don’t go too nuts with the salt (i LOVE salt, but healthy chips can be made unhealthy – don’t be fooled like i was). Go with your gut, unless your gut says “Make it snow! YAY, SALT!!!” Silly gut…
Cook your kale.
Derrrr. Oven – 180/200 degrees for not very long at all (5-10 mins MAX). Keep an eye on theses babies – looking forward to chips, and then burning them is the definition of disappointment.
EAT YOUR KALE CHIPS!!!!
They cool quickly so i usually end up eating most of them right off the pan. My toddler gets involved too, but he wears a whole lot more than he actually gets into his mouth so i like to put a large bowl under his face so i can catch the crumbs and NOTHING is wasted. I wish i was kidding.
You can fancy these up with a bit of creativity, but i tend to generally be too hungry to worry about that. Here is a nice idea for those who have a bit more restraint – http://www.somastudio.net/2013/02/crispy-kale-chips/
Brussel Sprout Chips
Wait! Don’t go! I promise you these will change your opinion of brussel sprouts FOR. EVER.
What you need:
Brussel Sprouts – one bag of
Vegetable Oil/Canola Oil
Salt & Pepper
*Optional dipping sauce (RECOMMENDED!)
Mayonnaise – about 6 tbsp
Minced garlic – 1/4 tsp
Lemon juice – 1 tsp
Flat-leaf parsley – 1 tbsp, finely chopped
What you do:
Wash your brussels.
I shouldn’t have to tell you to wash your cruciferous vegies. They are grown in dirt. You do the maths.
Hung, drawn & quartered.
By this i obviously mean – dry your brussels and cut them into quarters. I was trying to be clever and it back-fired. You got me.
Oil & season, season & oil.
I find it easier with these ones to just bung them in a bowl and splash a tbsp of oil on them, followed by salt & pepper to taste (remember to be kind to your blood pressure!). Toss them around until they glisten with potential chippyness (you’ll see).
Lay those babies down.
On a baking tray, lined with baking paper. And for the love of Jesus, Mary & Eric – GIVE ‘EM SPACE!
My son’s favourite current demand. So get to it! They should only take about 15 minutes (at 180 degrees celcius) and will be golden and delicious, but napalm hot when you get them out. You have been warned!
While you’re waiting for them to cool/cursing your burnt tongue and impatience you could make this super simple aioli which absolutely LOVES your brussel chips! Just throw all the mayo, garlic, lemon juice and parsley into a bowl together and make them one. Thats it.
That didn’t take long enough. You still need to wait. Trust me, it will be SO worth it if you still have a few operational taste buds.
Ok, so those are just two of about a bazillion possible healthy chip options you could make. But i will say this – All vegetables are improved by oven-baking with a little olive oil and some seasoning. ALL OF THEM. EVEN THE SHIT ONES.
DON’T CROWD YOUR TRAY!
Other yummo chip ideas:
Sweet potato fries – always a winner, and more chip-like for the uninitiated
Cauliflower – oh it works. Trust.
Zucchini – Wins for best texture.
Beetroot – Great colour!
….i could go on, but the possibilities are actually endless. Get creative!